ExcIETy
I'm for confusion!!! I don't know if its excitement or anxiety.
I was wrong when I thought that after bringing Neil to that family affair, the excitement would subside.
But no! Mom calls every day and asks (randomly) about the wedding deetz. My Tita Gaya calls me on my cell asking me to please reserve the venue already (thank God that's been settled!). My cousin Mattie texts me regularly (and calls me on the landline now when she used to not call me and would even choose not to reply to my texts) and asks how I'm doing (or more importantly, what I'm doing about the wedding). Coworkers make it a part of the daily comfort room chitchat. Fortunately my maids-of-honor are too busy with their own lives to send me a text message of a daily countdown for the wedding.
Or so I thought. I met up with Cam last night. We spent *some* time discussing the wedding deetz. So much so that I was thinking of what we had discussed until I fell asleep.
And the dreams came. And they never stopped until I woke up the next morning.
I dreamt of my wedding day. I was in my dress already. I was in hysterics. Apparently the caterer fails to deliver the food, and the misalette has been forgotten (as in nada - no misalette, no printouts, no copies). It's three hours until the wedding. No one offered any solutions. I was helpless.
I woke up this morning with the feeling that my gastritis problem has doubled up because of the stress I had in that dream! Crazy ( as Neil had said later this afternoon, when I told him about it) as it is, I was thinking of that stupid dream the whole day. It did nothing to help ease my nerves.
Don't blame me if one day I suddenly pack up with Neil and leave for Vegas. Mwahahaha.
Neil meets the rest of the family
He did - the night of my birthday!
As we entered my tita's house, everyone's eyes were on Neil. Everyone started talking all at once (that was comforting - at least we didn't get a menacing silence) - I didn't know to whom and how I would introduce Neil. Tita Lolly to the rescue - she pulled Neil by her side and started introducing him - "Neil, Mica's fiance" - to everyone. Everyone said a warm hello - and Tito Rudy came over, shook Neil by his hand, and asked in his loudest, snarling voice a series of questions that had Neil nodding with his frozen smile. Tita Lolly pulled him away again, as everyone laughed at my tito's attempt to scare him off.
Surprisingly, I didn't have butterflies in my stomach that night. At all.
It's a sick birthday
I came back from Nasugbu, Batangas yesterday with a fever (and burning, I tell ya). I was pretty okay at the beach - after I got up from sunbathing and went in to take my bath and change for home, I wasn't looking very good anymore.
They took me away from the beach, that's why! Hehehehe.
Anyway. I'm at the office today, working. I didn't want to stay home - pathetic. I decided I can handle work anyway.
Sigh.
Bookings galore
Why is everyone suddenly texting/calling me for bookings?
"Before you get married!" they say. "Let's go for one last trip/dinner/movie/coffee chat/shopping spree."
Why is it that I have to do "one last thing" before I say "I do"?
Nobody tells me why. Calling...all my married friends. What is it??? Whaaaat???
The newest New Year
Two more days 'til the new year starts.
I can't wait.
It'd be a different year, I'm sure. Well, this year has been a whole lot different - but I bet next year will be more, and there will be more of what I had this year.
Eeeek. My heart gives a different beat whenever I think of the coming year.
I think this is where I say - be still, my heart.
It's cab drivers' week
Yeah, if these frikkin idiots had a week in their commemoration, this would be it. Only it would be a different kind of commemoration. No one celebrates it but them.
So what happens during this week?
Oh, they get to choose their passengers. Or refuse them. Or charge an incredibly large fare. Or threaten the poor, unfortunate souls ("us") into not dropping them off where they're really headed.
And how they celebrate! They have their "Taxi" signs on, and have no passengers. They pass by slowly, making us think that they're "For Hire" - but they do that just to mock you and say, Ha! You pathetic git. You can't get a ride, hahaha.
Damn those cab drivers!!!!!!!!
Freaky!
Last Monday, I made a phone call to our caterer. (Note: I claim her "our" caterer, because we're really considering her to be the caterer for the wedding.) The person who answered told me to call again on the 19th (yesterday), because the caterer was on vacation.
I called up yesterday. A woman answered - who I found out later, was her cousin. I asked for the caterer.
I was in for a surprise. The caterer, she said, was buried just yesterday.
It took me a while to recover. It was just plain freaky (sorry Mrs. Caterer). I mean, someone from their family told me she was on vacation - perhaps they didn't know what to tell me. And here I was, thinking she was on vacation.
May she rest in peace.
Meanwhile, it's time to look for another one.
168 days to go
Or so they say at theknot.com. =)
There's less anxiety now. The Discovery Weekend helped a lot - not to mention a very timely phone call that I received Thursday night, a day before our pre-marriage seminar.
I was praying for a sign the whole week before the seminar. It's not that I relayed on that seminar to determine our fates (although people made a joke on that). I needed to understand what I or we were getting into.
The experience was - sublime. It wasn't the usual - that I can say. They touched on delicate topics like morality and sexuality...which we found surprising, and good. There were really a lot of learnings. At the end of the seminar, we were a little bit tired from waking up early and staying up until late at night for the whole thing, but it was worth it.
Like all the other things that I have gone through this year, this is yet another puzzle with its pieces starting to fall into place. The difference is, this is one puzzle that I'm going to work on with Neil.
Not alone. Not anymore.
=)
What did you do that for?
I know you.
If you like someone, you
Gaze into her eyes. Unblinking, you tell her how beautiful she looks. Your whole world, focused on her. You hold her hand.
Get to know what she likes. Give it to her.
Call her every day, if possible. Talk with her every day. Talk about everything. No, you wouldn't look stupid even if you talked about the most obnoxious things. Because in the end, nothing matters but her. Her her her.
You didn't have to
Caress her tummy.
Put your hand under her top.
Tell her you wanted to because it's close to her breasts.
Kiss her on the neck.
Invite her inside the room.In 24 hours.
When you knew her for practically your whole lifetime. As kids, irritated her to death. As teenagers, irritated her to death. As a grown-ups, irritated her to death.
Because we treated each other like family. We had a friendship that was pure.
I want to know why.
If you genuinely like her, do it properly.
I don't want you doing that to my best friend.
She's a very good person, inside out. Purehearted. Most of all, innocent. How could you have done that?
Discovering ourselves
Next week, Neil and I are attending this seminar called the "Discovery Weekend". It's supposed to let us assess our relationship and help us prepare for marriage.
The seminar will last through the whole weekend. And, get this - no cellphones allowed. Which means we won't be able to communicate with the outside world. Hmm, perhaps that would be good, since we're going to have to be focused on the whole thing.
Wish us well. =)
Sweet Transvestite from Transexual Transylvania
Last night I saw The Rocky Horror Show. It was a blast! What with black net stockings, skimpy clothing, blue orange gold hair colors, and a lotta butts - regardless of gender - it was most entertaining. Now I'm downloading MP3s from the musical. (Well if you woke up this morning singing "I'm a sweet transvestite from transexual transylvania...")
Hmmm. Really enjoyed the play.
Of disappointments and compromises
Let's say you've been looking for something.
Something that, long ago, you could only envision in your mind. But now, as you are given the opportunity to realize it, you feel happy and lucky and excited to go look for it.
I was fortunate enough to be given that chance.
I went to look for it. I was encouraged to look for it. It became part of my fate to look for it.
When I found it, there were no questions. This was it. What I was looking for. I was at peace with it. It was home.
And then, suddenly - it's going to be taken away. This thing I have my heart and my mind set on.
Certain compromises have to be made. Certain disappointments.
Sick in the city
After working late last Friday night, I looked forward to a nice dinner, a relaxing talk with Leah (hmm, were office stuff relaxing?), and perhaps watching a movie with John and his niece Ria.
Well, I did meet up with Leah - and talked about the office incident which happened early Friday evening (and which turned my stomach round)...met up with John, Ria, and another niece of his to watch Ghost Ship, which shook my (and Leah's) nerves. Ate five pieces of California Maki and a large Pepsi for dinner while watching the frigging movie. We at least had a relaxing time drinking coffee at Seattle's GB3, people-watching and chatting with the young. At 3:30 am, after taking Ria and Liz home, I realized my stomach was grumbling - so we went to Isshin to have some of their famous Ramen.
At around 4:30 am my stomach seemed to be taking a different turn. Strange - I never felt something like this before. Finally, at 5, we called it a night (morning) - and I dropped by the drugstore to buy some antacids before going home.
Woke up around lunchtime with that horrible, horrible stomach pain. Neil arrived (we were supposed to look up houses) - and stayed and took care of me. The pain wouldn't go away, so Neil took me to the ER at midnight. Two shots of painkillers. Strong antacids for the stomach.
Sunday - the pain still hasn't gone away. John and Pebbles paid me a visit - at least I was distracted from the horrible pains.
Monday - I couldn't go to work. Went back to the hospital - the doctor had too many patients in line; I was told to come back today.
Finally had that check-up today. Gaaad. A series of lab tests. I thought I was going to die when they got the blood samples from me. The test tube where they put my blood was full to the brim. Eeek. I felt very weak after that and cursed that blasted California Maki and Pepsi. I'm scheduled for an endoscopy on Thursday as well. They're going to see what's really wrong with my stomach. Mom's coming over; just in case I might need to be confined.
Tomorrow, I'm going to work. I NEED TO!!! Loads to do.
Darn this stomach. Auugggh.
Six months to go!
...and I still haven't started on the wedding preps. I didn't realize we only have six months to go until that family affair at Neil's last Sunday - where everyone talked about - yup - our wedding.
Funny thing is, we haven't talked about it yet - again - for a month now...? Gaaaaad. We seriously thought May '03 was too far away still.
=p
No more holiday home trips for me!
Yeah, after that 12-hour ride going home, and 10-hour ride going back to Manila, I swear, I ain't going home anymore on holidays! Instead, I'll bring home here in Manila. ;p
Six hours into the trip and we were still edging our way through the north expressway - I wanted to get out of the car and walk back to Manila. Well, what probably added to my irritation was that I was coming down with something.
True enough, when I got home, my coughing fits got worse. I kept barking along with Tabitha that night. I fell ill.
What a great way to spend a "restful" weekend.
