0917 8457086

That is the number of this guy who's been bothering me for two weeks now.

His first call - he was looking for Maui. I told him he had the wrong number.

His second, it was 4am the next day.

He would let my phone ring.

Three in the morning (while I was at the beach), he called me. And then wouldn't speak on the phone.

Today at 230 he called up. He wouldn't say a word. I called him up.

Sorry, just wondering where I got your number, he says.

Well I don't know! I say. I've already told you I wasn't Maui, so why do you still keep on calling me?

He tries to apologize. I give him more of that don't give me that B.S. thing.

He goes on to text me: can we be friends, then?

Cheapo.

Grrrr.

A most unusual (but great, nevertheless) beach trip

That was a very pleasant beach trip we had during the weekend.

As usual, it was John and me again, and everyone had their excuses. Hmp.

We left Manila at around 430 in the morning. First surprise: we arrived at the Batangas City pier a little before 630 - which let us board the 630 outrigger boat to White Beach. At 8am we found our perfect nipa hut (airconditioned, mind you), and at 9 we had finished our breakfast. First activity for the day?

Sleep, of course! Until around 1pm. When we were finally fully awake, we changed into our beach attires and headed for the shore. While I was lying down sunning myself, John was out in the water, wading nearby. Soon he was talking to this guy (who looked like he was trying to pick up John). I later found out that the guy's name was Raymond (as he was introduced to me).

Later that night, we saw Raymond again, hanging out with a couple-friend of his. He offered his seat to us. At first we declined, but he was too nice and insisted that we have a seat, so we did. I could tell he was curious about John and me (well, more about John ;p). I found out that he was a freelance scriptwriter.

Soon Raymond retired (I don't know where), and we were left watching the rest of the beautiful gay people around the bar. We got a little bored, so we decided to hang out in our hut for a while, and then go out again later (when hopefully there will be more beautiful people). But no! As soon as we hit the bed, we fell asleep. Fast.

Woke up early the next morning (another surprise), had breakfast (and I saw a classmate from college), and - went back to sleep. Woke up at noon, hung out the beach (I had a massage), John collected stones, Raymond came over for a little chat again, and then lunch.

As we were lining up for the boat ride back to Batangas, Raymond came running. Hitch with my couple-friends, he said. Uh, okay, we reply (a little cold and uncomfortable). Hmm, I told John. Your charms REALLY work.

We ended up hitching with Raymond's friends. They were a nice couple. It was from them that we found out that Raymond was an award-winning scriptwriter (Tanging Yaman, Anak). He was Raymond Lee.

As the weekend ended, John and I kept on thinking, how come nothing went wrong during this trip?

I can only mutter a word of thanks. It was a pretty darn good beach trip.

"Seize the moment of excited curiosity on any subject to solve your doubts; for if you let it pass, the desire may never return..." - William Wirt, American lawyer

If you really knew me, and years from now would try to recall one distinct character of mine, what would it be?

One of two things: the passion I have for things (especially the things I love); or, my lust for learning.

I don't know where I get the passion from, but I've just been this way with everything that I do. Come to think of it, I don't quite understand why.

And then learning. Oh yes, I have always been curious of things, and I yearn to learn. This has gotten me into trouble though - when time came that I wanted to do a lot of things all at the same time. I find it a healthy exercise, though.

If you really knew me, and years from now would try to recall one distinct frustration I have, what would it be?

One: having the opportunity to learn - and then having it taken away from you. Not even a glimpse of it allowed.

And then frustration turns to disgust.

Endangered culture

If there is such a thing.

Just before I left the office today, April and I were talking about the company culture. How it started, flourished, and eventually faded. Now it's almost gone - one crucial thing that brought us in (at least us oldies) into the company...the invisible thread that goes through each of us and holds us together, the one ring to bind us (eeeek, enough already).

Anyway. As always, we had one of those moments again, when one itsy bitsy question brought out a concern which in turn stirred our emotions and bang - there we were letting out our heartaches and frustrations.

And it all boiled down to one - culture endangered. Indeed, in a company like ours, where does one find comfort, and at the same time, inspiration, but in each other? The nagging issue now is - where is it? Where is the culture we once had?

Back to reality

I wish I can go on like this...but two days of not really talking to anyone - I learned - can raise the alarm. Friends have been sending me text messages and calling me on my cell (and landline, but I told my roommate to tell them I was asleep) but I ignored them (some I totally ignored; others I at least replied to tell them I was fine). I accepted a friend's offer to sleep over his place, but I could not tell him anything. I was quiet than ever. I declined another offer for me to stay there the whole day and think things over - decided to go home instead. [I had this urge to pluck the strings of my guitar; that I cannot ignore when I'm having the blues.]

Why do I have all these things to think about? Most of the time i just want to whack my head on the wall. Life is so simple - as I'm constantly reminded by a friend - but I just damn keep on forgetting.

So - again, I'm taking things one day at a time.

Besides, with friends and loved ones like that, who wouldn't want to give life a chance?

This burning desire

I have spoke with the tongue of angels

I have held the hand of a devil

It was warm in the night

I was cold as stone

But I still

haven't found

what I'm looking for

U2

Shut

That's where I want to be. What I want to do.

I've been thinking again. Oh, I hate it when this happens. I had this glazed look since last week. I wish because I've been high on something - but no.

I wish I'd stop already.

Somebody shoot me.